Soul Scientist

Does the thought of Christmas bring delight or dismay? If you’re living with chronic illness (or a caregiver to one who does), you might (reluctantly) say “a bit of both”… here’s a post to help bring joy for today, wherever you are or wherever you wish you were…

Proverbs 14:30 NIV A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones.

1 Timothy 6:6 RSV There is great gain in godliness with contentment.

Dearest Sarah,

Does it seem sometimes as chronic illness patients we’re watching the world go by without us? And this feeling can happen even if we’re not sitting in a wheelchair on the sidelines or lying in the bed hearing everything going on outside the bedroom. Sometimes conversation and interaction is more than I can do, even if I’m on the listening end with dear friends or family.

That feeling isn’t just frustrating, it’s frightening. This is because I know what can result from it – envy. Envy is the natural default and the normal defeat in times like these. But from personal experience, envy will rob me blind of the joy waiting there for me to uncover, whether or not my body stays under the bedcovers. Envy can destroy and deny no matter the circumstances.

As you well know, Elisabeth Elliot captured this idea with “the secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances.” She knew that envy grows best under the cover of discontent. She also knew that discontent is actually disguised arrogance. That pride that screams “why can’t I?” in my heart and mind but comes out of my mouth as a whispered “I wish I could.” And that whisper resounds louder and more insistently the longer I let that discontent or envy grow.

Discontent publicizes all that’s not as I’d planned instead of proclaiming all that God’s provided. As we’ve talked before, our Good God has provided for us with abundance. This abundance can either prompt us to abandon our own desires for His or to ask for just one thing more. There’s a sharp contrast between delight and discontent, both in my attitude towards God and my actions towards others (see Psalm 37:4 and Job 20:20). And from personal experience, I know well how my decidedly not-delightful discontented sharpness of attitude and words can tear down faith, joy, and peace in others’ lives. And unfortunately, this resounds especially true with those around me living in the hard of pain, grief, and loss. All of us are suffering in some way. My pain can speak to another’s pain and bring encouragement and hope. Or my discontent can drown out another’s pain and promote defeat and despair for the both of us. And trust me, that’s no way to live, much less to thrive, whether you have chronic illness or not.

Having said all of this (and the so much more of previous letters), I exhort you to choose contentment and thus, to choose life for you and for those in your life. This choice has to be made new every day but hallelujah, God’s mercies are new every morning for this choice and all the others to be made that day for Christlikeness (see Lamentations 3:22-23)!

I’ll end with one of my favorite verses – James 1:2 CSB Consider it a great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials. I didn’t understand this verse before chronic illness nor did I consider it a favorite one. But now, this verse (and so many others) are lifeblood for me as I say them over and again to myself during the course of the day. And many times, I say them aloud as to help my mind follow my heart in choosing joy.

And I pray for you many times during the course of a day too! For strength and help and hope. For joy and peace and courage. But most of all, for you to know the Presence of our Good God there with you as our Rock and Redeemer Who never changes or leaves in any way for anyone at any time.

With much love,

Your friend,

Beth

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written by and copyrighted to Beth Madison, Ph.D., 2023.