Soul Scientist

Psalm 111:5a NIV He provides food for those who fear Him.

Matthew 6:33 CSB But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be provided for you.

During my pregnancies with both of our sons, I had the same recurring dream about being at a wedding reception. Now almost 26 years later, I still can remember this dream vividly. At the reception, there were bunches of tables bursting with my favorite kind of food – what I call “wedding food.” Those tables full of little sandwiches, veggies, fruits, cheeses, crackers, dips, nuts, candies, cake, and punch were all speaking their special kind of love to my mouth. In the dream, I was in line ever-so- slowly walking up to start filling my plate from these tables.  

Unfortunately, I always woke up before I got to the tables.

I would literally wake up with drool coming out of the side of my mouth and disappointment taking over my still-sleepy mind. The disappointing reality that it was only a dream. And for the rest of the day, nothing in my kitchen, freezer, or pantry would really satisfy as a replacement for the dreamy yet denied-to-me wedding food.

These days, I have different a dream about food. Yet I see similarities between the dreams then and now. Today’s dream is that food would taste the way I remember it to taste. Instead of how it (usually) tastes disgustingly like something died in my mouth, even after I’ve brushed my teeth over and again. The virus that shall remain unnamed and cancer/chemotherapy have turned dreamy feasts into disappointing foods.

If I let them, these taste-robbers (or any of their unwelcome side-effect friends and fears about the future) will also deny me my dream of joy for strength for today and hope for tomorrow. Their defeat demands I choose to be satisfied each morning by my Jesus in my soul. For if my soul is satisfied, I can choose to follow my Jesus step by step wherever He leads. I think David knew this deliberate choice of joy and talked (or sang) about it here – Satisfy us in the morning with your steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all our days  (Psalm 90:14 ESV).

Step-by-step living isn’t full of dreams and delightful foods.

Step-by-step living is full of carrying a cross and coming to acceptance of the truth that my God’s ways are far higher, deeper, stronger, and better than mine (see Isaiah 55:11). And that’s not just the icing on the cake, that’s a whole cafeteria of truth!

What God does is good, whether or not I understand it.

His ways are good, whether or not mine are.

written by and copyrighted to Beth Madison, Ph.D., 2025

Thank you, friends, for your continued encouragement and support, especially in prayers. Andy and I are grateful for each and every one of you!

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