Soul Scientist

Psalm 111:10 AMPC The reverent fear and worship of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom and skill [the preceding and the first essential, the prerequisite and the alphabet]; a good understanding, wisdom, and meaning have all those who do [the will of the Lord]. Their praise of Him endures forever.

Dearest Sarah,

Even though this may be the last letter in your book, it’s definitely not the last letter you’ll receive from me. Nor the last text, call or email and especially not the last hug, smile, prayer, or visit! You can’t get rid of me that easily [grin].

We’ve talked through a lot in these letters. And there’s so much more that could, if not should, be talked about in thriving with chronic illness…but I surely hope that these letters have been a good addition to your education in chronic illness. You’re learning day by day, or quite literally step by step in physical therapy, the true worth of wisdom and the good gift of knowledge.

My grandfather, a great teacher of many and of many things, used to often say, “never stop learning!” to anyone who’d listen (or was in hearing distance). He believed and lived that phrase every single day. I’m trying and hoping to do the same with Scripture and soil science and people and persistence. Yet chronic illness is one topic I’d never choose to study but it’s one teaching tool that I’ve learned more from than any other.

The joke is that a Ph.D. is considered a terminal degree because you’ll never want to take another class by the end of it. (They’re not wrong.) The truth is that chronic illness is a terminal degree because you’ll always consider giving up or in to it, no matter how long it’s been since it began. (No joke.) Both are hard-earned degrees. Both are life-changing decisions. Both are done lesson by lesson, choice by choice. Both require grace and mercy, day by day.

Therein lies the beauty and the wonder in all of this, our Good God’s mercies are made new each and every morning as seen in Lamentations 3:22-23 MSG God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out, his merciful love couldn’t have dried up. They’re created new every morning. How great your faithfulness! I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over). He’s all I’ve got left.

All of my education, all of my determination, all of my opportunities don’t help even one little bit when it comes to making it through even one minute in chronic illness. It’s dependence on my Good God for another dose of mercy, another injection of grace, another treatment of love applied to my heart and life. Only He can and will bring me through this pain and self-pity into reliance and redemption. This disability, this degradation is only for the now; His Presence is forever. And that’s the truth I want engraved onto my heart and mind like He’s done with my name on His Hands (see Isaiah 49:16)!

Elisabeth Elliot captured this idea with “suffering is never for nothing.” She knew the hard was never without hope as long as she held hard to her Jesus. For she knew that her Jesus would never let go of her. I think that’s one of the most important lessons I’ve learned in this school of chronic illness – nothing (or no one) can or will make Jesus let go of me because He loves me dearly. That’s an especially hard lesson to learn but it’s an essential. And to me, it’s oh, so very precious, just as you and your family are to me!

I love you, dearest Sarah. I am praying for you. And I won’t stop doing either.

Keep looking for more letters from me, but especially always keep looking for the lessons from our Jesus Who loves you far more than you can ask or imagine.

Much love from your friend,

Beth    

That was an excerpt from the book, “Letters to Sarah: Thriving in Chronic Illness”, scheduled to be released in 2025. And yes, these are real letters to a real person written by a real person living a life marked by chronic illness and more importantly, a life marked by a very Good God.

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written by and copyrighted to Beth Madison, Ph.D., 2024.